


Counting Stars

by the_queen_of_thedas



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition, Greek and Roman Mythology
Genre: Chapters i'm going to add to crossing stars, Drabbles, Modern Girl in Thedas, Modern Goddess in Thedas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-24
Updated: 2016-05-24
Packaged: 2018-06-10 12:56:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6957397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_queen_of_thedas/pseuds/the_queen_of_thedas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chapters that I've written for my main fic 'Crossing Stars'. These chapters will be added to the fic once we get to that part of the game... I hope... Well, that's the plan anyways.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Counting Stars

**Author's Note:**

> Setting: campfire, campsite, Crestwood, night
> 
> Lead up: Varric is pestering Asteria for a story about her childhood, he asked about her first love (idk), Asteria gets a little mad and frustrated, though she finally gives in when Bull and Solas join in with Varrics persistence. Eventually, she agrees to tell them a story about her childhood and how she met her husband (though she fails to mention his actual relationship towards her) 
> 
> When she was going to start to tell how they met, she draws a blank on his name. Panicking thank she can't remember her name, and that the others are all watching, expecting a story from her. She goes on to tell a 'story' from when she was just a girl.

Sighing, Asteria sat back down on the log, the fire casting a red glow on her face. "Fine, I'll give you a story." She kicked her feet out and rested her hands behind her head. She needed to make this seem like a spur of the moment. Not a distraction, not a way for her to remember. ‘ _What was his name?’_ Asteria cursed internally.

“I remember a story from when I was younger. It's more of a creationist tale, but it's still pretty good. At least in my opinion."

Orion turned to her quickly, their eyes locked. He knew what she was going to tell them. Not just any story, but her story.

"Asteria." He tried.

"Orion." She countered blandly. She knew what she was doing. If anything she desired to tell them. This was no longer a game. This was their life, these were her friends, her companions. They deserved a half-truth than a fruitless lie. She also needed to remember. She could not forget, it would be her breaking point. ‘ _How could I have forgotten his name?_

"Long ago, before the Maker, humans needed something to believe in, something to answer questions, someone to blame for struggle and strife. So they created the idea of chaos. And from chaos came the ground and the sky-- and their doomed love. It was said that the sky sought after the ground for many eons until their passion for one another grew to an extreme."

"Sounds like somebody needed to pop their corks." Iron Bull added, earning him a chuckle from those listening, mostly Varric… okay, it was only Varric.

"Yep. And in one moment of passion the sky and the earth met, and the first children were born. the Titans." She noticed how Solas twitched at the word. She hadn’t played the Descent DLC, but she knew enough about the Thedas Titans from wiki entries. “And it’s not the Titans you’re used to- not saying you’re used to Titans, it's just that they aren’t made of rock.” The others gave her blank stares. “Well some were, but that’s kind of not the point… Yeah never mind… Let’s just say for all intents of purposes, that they’re just forms of being.” She smiled running a hand through her hair half hazardously.

The confused looks Bull, Varric and Solas were casting her way proved she needed to articulate the point a bit better. “Ugh, let’s just say that they were a race completely their own, and they could look like whatever they wanted to.”  She didn’t really exaggerate that factor, they could choose whatever gender, race, form… etc they wanted. Typically they went with the least conspicuous...or at least she did… less work trying to fit in. sighing she continued on.

 "Now the Titans were a powerful race, within the first generation of Titans, there were six girls and six males. Each one was given a domain for them to rule. They ranged from nature to the psyche:  light, oceans, time, memory, wisdom or even … night." In the beginning, we were kind, innocent... we knew nothing of corruption... Asteria missed those days. The days where she was young and naïve. Able to see past all the injustice, it wasn't until she was older that she realized what true monsters her kin had become.

 Taking a steady breath she continued. "W-They developed the world from a bare wasteland to one flowing with rivers and mountain streams. Eventually the wisest of u-them created man." She looked over to her companions begging they hadn't caught her potential slip. She was surrounded by some of the most perceptive people in Thedas. She couldn't be so careless. Her rashness in telling this story was already backfiring. Orion noticed this too. How she was showing too much emotion for a story she played up to just be a regular tale.  

 "I supposed that the other races were not part of their creation." Solas retorted almost bitterly. The Titaness was surprised that it was the only thing he caught.

 "Kind of, the elves and dwarves were also created with humans. I was just putting us all under a giant umbrella for the sake of storytelling." She added with ease.

 "And the Qunari? Where do we fit into all 'this'," Bull said using air quotes ' _Shit_.' He did have a point and  Asteria thought back to all the crack pot theories she read online. Where the elves and dragons were bred together to make the first kossith. It was something she could play into.

 "They aren't an 'original' race or so the tale goes. We'll get to that in a sec, though." She tried to calm Bull who looked already displeased with her response. With a nod from him, she continued.

"So yeah, they created dwarves, humans, and elves. And from them, they amassed worshippers. Each prayer gave them power and the more power the greedier they became. The sky became jealous of their power. He saw that his children were more loved than he was. So he hatched a plan to grow them all into the deepest part of the earth ground never to be seen again. A place called Tartarus; A deep abyss that is used as a dungeon of torment and suffering for the wicked. It was said that time did not exist in that place, for time meant hope. And the sky wanted none of it for his children.

"So wait, you're telling me that the sky hated his children and was going to lock them away in a timeless dungeon where they'd be tortured for eternity? Shit, and I thought my parents were bad." Asteria gave a chuckle at Varric retort.

"Yeah, kind of sounds harsh when you put it that way. But hey, parents can be asses sometimes eh?" A hardy laugh escaped her. "So yeah, the sky wanted to lock his children away but the ground said 'no'… well in a more 'NO!' kind of way.

“She loved her children and would do anything to shield them from the skies treachery. So she commissioned one of her children to overthrow their father, Cronus. He was the youngest of the Titans yet the most steadfast in his ways. Rash and determined, he defeated his father and cast him into the sea. Ge- the ground was thankful for his service to her and his siblings and named him king of the Titans. A title he wore proudly but also with arrogance. He ruled with an iron fist, turning many of the other Titans to commit despicable acts. Many of the Titans resorted to the slavery of their own creations or those within their domain." The Titaness shuddered at the memory. Selene forcing the moon to push the tides closer to crumbling cities. Mnemosyne forcing humans to forget their worshipping of other Titans so that they would worship her in their absence. Hyperion driving away the light from the field of farmers who had not paid a plentiful offering. Each one abusing their power for personal gain, each one paving their legacy with the bodies of innocents. It was then that she vowed never to be like them.

"Eventually, though, a Titaness had a vision of his defeat, a blessing to her and to the world in her mind. Skillfully she played the King of the Titans into her hands; telling him of the vision she had, but stating that it was a prophecy.  She told him that his sons and daughters will one day rise up and overthrow him."

"Smart lady. She manipulated him into becoming paranoid and looking for daggers in every shadow. Nice move." Bull added with an approving grin. He crossed his arms and leaned back against the log waiting for more of the 'story'. The light from the fire only illuminating half of his face.

"She was a smart cookie that one." The Titaness added with a grim smile. She cast a glance to Orion who was watching her patiently. He gave no indication of approval or displeasure, only a sense of contentment in just listening. He knew the story well, Styx! He lived some of it. The betrayal, the war, the manipulation, the espionage. The memory scarred them both.

 "Not just smart, cunning as well," Orion added solemnly.  

 "I bet she'd appreciate you saying that Ri."

 "I bet." He gave raised an eyebrow and the Titaness continued on with her story.

 "So when Kronus and his wife were 'blessed' with children. Kronus, wanting to secure his position as ruler of the world decided he needed to 'get rid of his children'. But since they were immortal he couldn't just off and kill them. So he decided that the next best course of action was to make them the main course."

 "You're shitting me!" Bull exclaimed. "So he just eats his children to secure his position. Shit." He looked up to the sky and continued on in a subtler tone. "Kind of makes me glad we don't have families." ' _Aww, Bull.'_ She wanted to give him a hug or something. Asteria never understood the idea of growing up like the Qunari. With no family, only their duty, to lead them on; their faith to believe in. It all seemed to force. She was no saint to be preaching about parentage, though, gods know she had enough of their idiocy and tyranny for a lifetime, but she would never state that she was better off never having them. She learned from her parent's mistakes, how they followed blindly and didn't question any order Kronus had given them. Asteria had learned to not follow like a sheep to slaughter, to stand fast in her choices, morals, and opinions. She treasured those lessons greatly.   

"It makes sense, though, politically." Solas piped up. As all eyes turned to him he remained at an impassive and unbothered by the sudden shift in attention. "He was doing what he saw was fit to do, wrong nonetheless, but sound in his paranoia."  

"You can't be serious Chuckles, there's nothing 'sound' in eating your children." The dwarf announced.  

"You fail to grasp my meani-"

"I'm just going to carry on with the story. You guys can have a battle of definition and meaning after I'm in my bedroll." Asteria said crossing her arms.  

Solas and Varric both turned from each other and continued to listen.

"Ir abelas," Solas muttered.  

"Great!" The Titaness clapped her hands. "So I was at the part with the baby eating right?" She looked around at the nods to continue. "Groovy, let's carry on then shall we." She took in a breath, ‘ _His names, on the tip of my tongue.’_ She noted to herself.

"So Kronus had six children in all. Now these children were not considered Titans, they were called gods. Now only five of the gods had been given to Kronus to eat. The six, however, was not given to Kronus. In his place, Kronus wife, fearing for her children, deceived the King and fed him rocks covered in cloth. His wife spirited the god away and watched her husband's appetite sated now that his throne was safe, didn't think twice about his children. A mistake for him."

"Years later the sixth god grew strong and vengeful. The Titaness saw his vengeance and determination to end his tyrannical father's rule, so she went to him and told him of the Titans paranoia when it came to the future. She then taught him a potion made of mustard and milk that would release his siblings from their stomach prison.  

“Taking the advice of the Titaness the god went to his father under the disguise of an oracle and convinced him that he would no longer have to stomach the fear of his children defeating him." She winked at Varric to see if he got her terribly placed pun. The dwarf shook his head. "The Titan king drank the potion at his son’s request and upheaved his children. Though they emerged in full battle armor and fully grown. Not saying that that's the best way to be vomited up, but at least they made an entrance." She looked up to the unfamiliar stars. ‘ _P-- started with a P’_

"With their freedom came a great war. Titan vs God. Generation vs generation. The ultimate battle for the ear-Thedas. The Titaness detested how her kin ruled, so when the time came for her to pick her side, she stood with the gods. Though she wasn't alone in her choice. She compelled her sister and another Titan to joining what she thought was the better side.... For that, they were branded traitors to their kin. Despised and hated... They fought against their wives, their husbands and children.” Hecate her daughter, the look of betrayal as she faced off against her and Perses’s. Her eyes went wide.

‘ _I remembered!’_ She wanted to squeak. How could she have forgotten her own husband's name? Given that it was arranged, how could she ever forget? She looked around wide-eyed to Orion who gave her ‘that look’. You now the one where they want you to at least seem like you’re okay, but also coaxing you on. Yeah, that look. With a slight nod and a curious look from Bull, she continued on. “They fought until the gods had won."  

Solas eyed her quizzically. "What of the Titans? You said they couldn't die, where did they go?" Asteria took a deep breath and turned to meet his gaze.  

With a neutral voice and expression, she responded. "They locked them away in Tartarus. They're still alive... Probably...." Would they still be alive, though? Did the prison affect their immortality? Since time was of no issue to them, would they be affected by the slipping faith humanity had in myths?  

Varric may a ‘huh’ noise. He was taking note of all the ways her story had turned and spiraled. The number of parallels he saw to what was happening now upset him. But he couldn't help but draw lines. Finally, he spoke.  "So the reason why the Titan king guy killed his father, was so that he wouldn’t get thrown in the dungeon. But eventually, his own kids did the same to him. That's the definition of poetic irony right there."  

Asteria considered it for a moment. And gods be damned he was right. She almost wanted to laugh at the irony. The Titaness rested her hands behind her head. How had she not seen that? Styx, she lived it. "When you put it like that, I guess it is."

Varric cast her a roguish smile.  

"Did the rebel Titans get thrown in the dungeon too?" Bull inquired honestly but gauged her reaction. Her story seemed to be easy enough to follow. It was basically just a progression of greed and power, and the select few actually manipulating the game to their own advances. It was quite like normal human culture. Nothing but a mad dash for power and money. All predictable. Except for the Titaness. Her only motivation it seemed was to get the guy out of power. Not claim if for herself, but just to see peace. Bull wondered if the rebel got what she deserved, or if the other Titans ripped her apart for her betrayal. Either way, she was screwed. Locked away with her fellow deities she'd be tortured. If she stayed with the gods, she'd be treated as an outsider, a lower class citizen. But that wasn’t the point Bull concluded. It was how she was telling the story. The amount of emotion or lack of, made it seem like it was more than that. That her story was more personal then she’d lead the other onto believe.

Solas though seemed to think along the lines of parallels and the hidden meanings between the words, not the expressions. He noted all the similarities that her story had in common with the Enavuris and his own past. The Forgotten Ones and the Creators battle was similar to the Titans vs Gods. How the pantheon misused and defiled the trust and faith their worshippers put in them. How though sought nothing past their jealousy and greed. Not caring how many seas they filled with the blood of The People. And like the Titaness, he sought to end that wrong. Locking away the gods and putting up the veil, and sentencing his people to the shadows of what they once were. They weren't that different from each other. Both seeking to bring peace to an evil empire only to cause more death and strife.  

He came to the theory that her story was more or less loosely based off that of the pantheon. So much of the history, the true history, echoed through her tale. It was hard to deny the fact.

 "The Titaness... You really want to know what happened to her?" Asteria was taken aback. She didn't think they'd hang on to that. To her. She scanned the campfire, Bull and Varric nodding for her to carry on. Solas sat there an elbow resting on his knee and his chin resting on his hand intently, his eyes never once giving away his thoughts. ' _I'm screwed.'_ She thought momentarily before finally looking at Orion. He was standing arms crossed back slightly turned to the fire. She should've listened to him. She shouldn't have been so rash. Stupid Stupid Stupid.  

 "Ah well, she and her remaining kin weren't locked away. They were instead forced to bow to the new pantheon. An act they would regret.  

 “The gods were cruel to them; they only saw their lineage, not the loyalty and trust that they had put into them. The gods only saw them as Titans, and they treated them as such. If any of them slipped up, they were at the god's mercy and pleasure... It was horrible to say the least. Each moment they were watched, every action scrutinized, any sign of regret or remorse for locking away their own kin, they would be reprimanded for. It had gotten to the point at which the Titaness had, had enough. She took a stand against the gods. Basically telling them to 'go fuck themselves' and that they should be 'treated as an equal' for not only helping to put them on the throne of the world, but also taking all their shit."

 She remembered how nervous she had been. But she did what she had to do. No longer would Prometheus be tortured for giving man, his own creation fire, no longer would she let her sister Leto be subjected to Zeus's advances, no longer would she have to deal with the backlash of Apollo. They were all done with the gods shit. They had betrayed their family for the chance at a better future. Asteria regretted having to choose between her kin and the gods. She regretted it every day. At the time, she saw it as choosing good over bad, when it really was just choosing the lesser of two evils.

 "That's badass!" Bull shouted enthusiastically interrupting her thoughts. Asteria blushed and smiled. If not for the fires flicker, the others probably would've seen the red creeping across her cheeks. ' _You're badass too, Bull.'_  

 "You've got that right." Orion chipped in with a smirk from his brooding position.

 ' _I'm going to throw a bowl at him if he keeps that stupid grin.'_ The Titaness stuck out her tongue jokingly.

 "Don't give me that face, we both know it's true. You just hate when people pick apart your story before you're done." He uncrossed his arms and walked over to where the immortal leaned against the log. Taking a shimmering hand, he rested it on her shoulder and gave her a warm smile, before plopping down unceremoniously beside her.  

 "I'm going to throw a bowl at you," Asteria stated plainly as the constellation stretched out beside her resting his feet on her lap.  

 "Ha! Dots, with your aim you'd miss. I saw you practicing throwing daggers at trees in Haven. you couldn’t hit a tree if you were in the middle of the forest." Varric chirped. Asteria only rolled her eyes and gave him a playful scowl.

 “Wanna test that my good fellow?” She inclined raising a brow. Pushing Orion’s feet off her unceremoniously, Asteria stood to meet her challenge. Bull laughed and Solas only shook his head a ghost of a smile on his lips. They all knew that she couldn’t hit a stone wall if it was three feet in front of her let alone a setup target.

 “Are we betting money?” Varric said reaching clapping his hands and rising to his feet.

 “Yepparoony.”

 Solas chuckled. “Might as well just give him the coin now and be done with it.” Asteria brought her hand to her chest and gave the elf an overly dramatic look of ‘how dare you?’.

 “You wound me my friend.” The Titaness gasps dramatically. Earning her an eye roll. She then turns to Varric. “Tomorrow my jolly good dwarf?” She settled back down onto the ground, this time, Orion was the seat cushion. “I’ll carry on with the tale.” Resting her head on the constellation’s lap she gave a cheeky glance up to the dwarf.

 “How could I possibly turn down an offer like that dots?” He chuckled. Replacing Bianca on his back.

 Varric enjoyed the story so far. The more she went on the more he became enraptured by the way the girl had woven the subtleties into her story. Varric had to give her credit for creative license and talent.

 “Where was I?” She placed a hand on her face, looking up to the vast amount of stars. “The whole ‘badass’ ‘I’m not going to take their shit.’ part.” She shook her head. “Soooo- the gods eventually reluctantly agreed and allowed them to be considered part of the ‘gods’ though they were never actually given the ‘title’. Yes, air quotes included.” The Titaness raised an eyebrow to ponder Bull, who merely raised his hands in defense.

“I didn’t say anything,” Iron Bull said defensively.

“You didn’t need to.” She stated blankly back at him. His eyes narrowed as she continued. “Eventually, the great and powerful empire that the gods had created, crumbled to dust, their faithful moved on to new religions and tales. The era of the gods had come to a closer and as their empire was scavenged for another to erected itself in its place, the gods were powerless to change the life cycle of empires and nations. One rises, it flourishes and then falls, to where another will emerge.” Bull watched as her gaze turned to Solas. Who merely sat on his log with a deadpanned expression.

“Where do the gods go once the empire falls?” The elf asked plainly, his body language never shifting from its typical rigid form.

“They live on in the world. They will still carry on with the ages until they to are forgotten and die.” her eyes darkened and her jaw tightened.

“How can something immortal die? Doesn’t that kind of defeat the purpose of immortality?” Bull probed. The girl raised her head to meet his intense regard. She didn’t shy away from his question, if anything she rose, figuratively and literally to meet it. Sitting up she leaned back against the log.

“Everything dies eventually Bull. It’s the way of life.” She looked blankly into the fire, the flames casting dancing light across her pale skin. “It’s when you think that you can avoid death do you really lock yourself into its jaws…” Her voice trailed off. Everyone gathered around the fire fell quiet as well. Each one of them regarding her words in a different light.

Solas took her words the hardest, though. He contemplated on her meaning behind them. How accurate she was with the empire's falling and being rebuilt from its ashes. Isn’t that what he was doing? Trying to resurrect a fallen empire. An empire that fell because of him. It was in the nature of the world to die and then to have a rebirth. And rebirth is what he was going to give The People. A new beginning, the one they deserved.

He wasn’t avoiding death, he was bypassing its finality.

“Well,” Varric said breaking the silence with a clap. “I for one think that that was a great story. I think I might just take snippets of that for a new book.” He stretched and patted Bianca gently. “Maker knows I need some new material.” walking over to the tent he shared with Solas, he pulled back the door flap and entered. “I’m hitting the bedroll, if I did my math correctly I should have the night off for watches.”

Asteria yawned nodding. “Yeaaaah- Bulls got first watch, then me and finally Mr. Deep-Sleeper over here,” pointing with her thumb to Solas. “Who’s also on breakfast duty.”

A collective groan escaped the group.

“Awe come on Boss, none of us are going to be able to fight let alone shit for the next week if he’s left to cook. _Again!_ ” Bull complained. The grim reminder of the elfs cooking was still vivid in their minds. For all his ‘wisdom’ and ‘knowledge’, the smug ass couldn’t boil water if he tried. He could catch the meal, skin it, but when it came time to putting the meat to the fire, he’d either charr the void out of it, leaving the flavour less than savoury. Or he’d not cook it long enough, Blackwall was the one suffering from their shortened trip to the Hinterlands. The Iron Bull wasn’t really that inclined to see when the apostate could do with breakfast. It should be rudimentarily impossible to ruin eggs, oatmeal, and nuts. But Solas would probably find a way.  

“Can’t you do it? At least then we’ll have the chance of walking away.” Varric called out from inside the tent. Bull nodded along.

Asteria let out a reluctant sigh. “Yep.” Solas gave her a sympathetic look and shook his head.

 “It’s my duty, I should be the one to prepare the meal. I can’t ask you to give up your rest for the sake of my terrible cooking.” The Titaness smiled with thin lips. She appreciated his concern, it was touching. Kind of cute in a way. But she knew that she wasn’t going to get much sleep anyways.

 “I’ll be fine.” She clapped her hands, “Plus, it’ll give us some time alone.” Varric made a catcall from inside the tent much to a rousing Solas’s discomfort. “Not like that you pervy dwarf.” she snapped back at him. Running a hand through her hair she gave a side smile to Solas. “Well unless you’re open to that, I bet Bull would let us borrow some of his ‘equipment’.” The Titaness winked playfully. The tips of Solas’s ear darkened.

“um-I-” He tried to say in his defense. A deep laugh from his surrounding companions cutting him off. Solas abruptly stood up and bid Iron Bull, Orion and Asteria a good night and retreated to his tent. Where Varric waited to badger him a bit more.

Bull slapped Asteria on the back as she too now stood to head to her bedroll. “You’re going to give the elf a fucking heart attack if you keep this up.” He bellowed giving her a wink. Or was it just a blink? Asteria always had trouble telling one from the other. Let’s just say it was a wink.

Asteria shrugged. “Serves him right for not being able to roast a plucking chicken.”

Orion shook his head. “Your attempts at jokes are getting worse and worse.” He turned now to Bull who was sitting beside the fire, back to them sharpening his giant battle ax. Orion then spun to face the Titaness. “We need to talk later,” he whispered.

Iron Bull’s ear twitched at the quiet comment.  He watched in the reflection of his ax as the form of the constellation faded into mist and engulfed the Herald. She sighed and then retreated to the tent they shared.

Asteria laid down on her bedroll and covered herself with requisitioned furs. She tossed and turned for the next few hours as she constantly had flashbacks or memories of her childhood, her husband, Hecate, Leto and the wars. On the bright side, she was remembering. Remembering names and faces, actions and inactions. She thought back to what she would’ve done differently. She barely got a wink of sleep let alone actual ‘fade time’. She cursed herself when Bull came into the tent to get her for her shift. 

Stretching, and cracking her joints she stood to take her watch. The fire was low, and the light that came from it only went so far out into the great beyond's of Crestwood. Yep all they had were dwindling forests, rocks, grass and a stupid amount of hills. Sighing she plopped down onto the waiting log.

It wasn’t long into her shift that Orion materialized beside her. He sat on the log, quiet and in his typical spectral form. They sat like that for minutes, arms crossed until he finally broke the silence.

“I couldn’t find you in the fade.”

“Nope,” She stated popping the 'P'. Orion sighed.

“You shouldn’t have told them.” He spoke plainly. She knew the danger of telling them, she knew that it would cause all these memories to come flooding back. She knew that she couldn’t keep lying to them so profoundly.  It was a necessary evil, a necessary risk. “

“I had to.” She paused trying to find the right words. “I-I forgot his name. I forgot Perses’s name.” Orion gave her side ways look He knew that her memory was getting bad. But he’d never think it so, that she’d forget that much. That large of a piece. “It was the only way I could see it.” She let out a shaky breath and ran her hand through her hair. “I-I needed to remember.”

“I see-” He laid a hand on her thigh and gave a friendly squeeze. “It was a valid reason, but still risky.” He removed his hand and placed it in his own lap. “You shouldn’t have told them, though, they were already picking apart your story. They already picked you out of it.”

Asteria bit her lip.

“I know…” She said breathlessly. “I didn’t realize they’d be that perceptive.” she gave a slight chuckled. Why would she doubt their keen eyes though? Varric was a born storyteller and gambler. He could pick out a tell and pinpoint your country of origin within seconds, and from 100 paces back.

Now Solas just reads between the lines, he’s got the experience to know when something isn't right when there're too many parallels. His curiosity is also going to end up killing him. What’s the old saying? Curiosity killed the cat..? I guess Dreadwolf in this case.

Finally, there was Iron Bull. By trade, he was supposed to sift through lies and stories. Like this. She was stupid to think that she could ever pull the wool over his eyes enough to make him not draw a conclusion. He was a frigging Ben-Hassrath for Styx’s sake. Of course, he’s at least pick up on a few things.

Sighing she looked up to the stars. “I don’t want to forget anymore, Ri. I’m sick and tired of drawing blanks on something I should know.” She turned her regard back to the constellation. “Like you know the whole thing with Charter and Butcher. I couldn’t for the life of me remember where he'd be.” She said a little too loud. Orion’s hand came to rub her back.

“It’s okay.” He cooed. “It’s different here than back home. Everything's off here.”

“But it’s not okay!” She stood up frustrated. “These are real people with lives, Orion. It isn’t a fucking game! I’m tired of thinking that way.” She angrily tossed a log on the fire, sparks danced from the already burning logs. “I can’t just say oops and reload a save, I need to be ready. What am I going to do if I forget something big like at the Winter Palace? Huh?! Those are people's lives.” She plopped right back down beside her companion. “I can’t risk it… I- I can’t.”

They sat in silence for another few minutes. The sounds of the crackling fire and crickets, their only reminder of sound.

Orion opened his mouth to say something, only to decide against it. He wanted to tell her that she was right, that this wasn’t a game, that everything would be fine regardless if she knew what was going to happen. He knew though that she wouldn’t listen. He knew how stubborn she could be.

“I understand this isn’t a game. You need to understand though that you’re not just and Inquisitor Eria.” He paused to look over at a solemn Titaness. “You’re a Titan. You know and can do things that they others can’t. To Tartarus with the butterfly effect. You can and you will make this world right again, it’s in _your_ nature to help and to be a guide. So be it. Don’t let the ‘what if’s’ of memory and pressure of reality choose your fate. Make it yourself. That’s what you’ve always done.” Orion tried to console. Asteria merely looked over to him. Her eyes watery and glienting. “I believe in you.”

A tear fell from Asterias eye as she hastily embraced her friend. Choking back a sob she managed a simple ‘thank you’. Seeing that it was time for his leave, Orion dissipated and the Titaness was left alone for the remainder of her watch.

When she went to wake a grumpy Solas from his fade-deep slumber. She reminded him to wake her to prepare breakfast. With a nod, he stretched and took up his post at the fire.

Pulling back her tent flap she squeezed in past Bull to her bedroll. Plunking down unceremoniously she laid there thinking about Orion’s words. He was right. She had always tried to forge her own destiny, why would Thedas be any different? With a long exhale she finally managed to close her eyes and fade off into a slight sleep.

  
Bull counted his every breath until he was sure she was asleep. His thoughts still racing from the conversation he’d overheard.


End file.
